Wednesday, February 27, 2008

The Dress... No, the other one

We've all heard stories about the dress. You know what I'm talking about. It's pink. It has poofy sleeves. It makes you look 10 years older and 20 pounds heavier. Yup, it's the dress for the bridesmaid, and it's about as pretty as a jellyfish.

Lucky for me, my sister isn't a sadist and supports bridesmaids' rights. She promises no floor-length gowns that look like prom dresses from 1998. She scoffs at bridal catalogs with super-trendy, ultra-cheesy, canary yellow and sun-kissed orange frocks. She even threw out the line -- the line every bridesmaid wants to hear, and believe.
"I want to get something you can all wear again."

The term "wear again" is a tricky one, ain't it girls? Wear again does not mean " if you take it to the dressmaker and get it cut and hemmed." It does not mean "maybe if you put a belt with it" or "it could totally be dressed down with the right jacket -- if you're idea of dressed down is looking like you're back in college taking the walk of shame after a fraternity semi-formal."

The definition of "wear again" should be this: It's a basic color. It's a basic cut. It's not made of cheap satin, polyester, or anything else that screams bridal bin. It doesn't have crazy bows or pin-on flowers. Think simple. Think classy. Think "I want my friends to still talk to me after the wedding."

This was the dress I had initially suggested. It's from Jcrew.com, which has an adorable selection of bridesmaid dresses that fit into the "wear again" category with almost no effort. Here's a photo:




Cute, right? But picking a dress isn't that easy. My sister has six bridesmaids, and it goes without saying that different women feel, well, different, in certain cuts and colors. And so begins the bridesmaid dress emails, which are a series of messages with links to websites for bridesmaid dresses. At least two or three people will like the same dress. Maybe even four, and on a miraculous occasion, five. But getting six women to unanimously agree on a dress would be like getting Congress to unanimously agree on a plan for Iraq.

The tip would be this:
If you're the bride, pick the dress yourself. Think about your wedding day, about what you want as far as color and style, and if your friends are close enough to you to be part of your wedding party, they should be close enough to wear whatever makes your day perfect for you. If you have some sort of super-sympathetic complex going on, maybe from your own bridesmaid dress experiences, pick out a selection of two or three dresses that would make you equally happy and have your bridesmaids choose from that.

The other option (and JCrew is great for this -- even though I sound like an advertisement here) is to
pick out a color from one retailer and let your bridesmaids pick their own cuts. Got a size zero flat-chested maid? No problem. Go with the strapless. Double-D's and killer hips? Stay clear of halters and let her show off her sexy curves with something high-cut and fitted.

If nothing else, this should make you feel better. Ladies and gentlemen (yeah, like any guys are reading this), a website featuring the WORST bridesmaids dresses ever:

http://www.uglydress.com/

Happy planning...

2 comments:

carrie said...

well, you just described what i did, so i think your advice is great! none of my brides picked out that particular dress, but they're all cute.

Anonymous said...

dear cait,

i think YOU might be the "sassy" one. this blog is keeping me laughing - so you keep up the good work! dinner soon?

xo,
sassy